Strong When You Have To Be....

For the longest time I never thought of myself as a strong person. There are times now that I don't see myself as strong. There were times in my life when I felt so fragile and vulnerable, and it was at those times that I wondered if I would make it through whatever storm I was going through at that time. And then on August 1, 2011, I was hit with what may the equivalent of an F5 tornado. I was told I had cancer.  Here I was, 39 years old, recently married, a five year old daughter at the time, and I was diagnosed with cancer. Let me tell you...if there was a time that I ever felt fragile and vulnerable, this was the time! The initial shock was pretty overwhelming. Of course my wife and I were trying to make sense of it all, but in reality we couldn't. But then a strange thing happened. After a couple of days, after the first few waves of emotion had passed, and after living with and accepting the news for a few days, there was a calmness that overcame me. Sure there was still many uncertainties that we would face, there were still struggles and hardships that we have to face in the months to come, but deep inside my spirit, I knew that we would be okay and the this was just another storm to go through. As a matter of fact, one of my mantras was, "This is just a bump in the road that we will get over!"

Maybe that's the thing about inner strength....maybe we really don't know what kind of strength we possess until we have to rely on that strength in order to survive. I can look back now and tell myself, "Yea...I guess I was strong when I needed to be." But at that time, it really had nothing to do with deliberately telling myself that I had to be strong. I think much of it had to do with survival and knowing that I had to fight the "C" monster! There was no room for negative thinking...there was no room for being overwhelmed with emotions....there was no time for feeling sorry for myself. All of those kind of thoughts had no room in my plans of kicking the monkey on my back square in the face and telling him to leave me alone!

Even though I had my fight with cancer and I was blessed with being able to overcome it, there are many people out there who face their own struggles but yet aren't acknowledged for it. The single parent trying to be both mom and dad all while providing for that child and trying to make ends meet. What about the elderly people who are put into nursing homes and no one goes to visit them? Then there are people who may see like they have their life together, but secretly they are battling their own demons. The thing that all these people have in common is that they go on day after day and continue to overcome their challenges in life. They may not be aware of it, but their inner strength is constantly being displayed.

So when you think that you aren't strong enough to get through life's everyday challenges. When you feel like life is getting the best of you. Remember that YOU have that inner strength inside of you too! Take any challenge that life throws at you and KNOW that you can overcome it.You really are stronger than you think you are and when you get over that mountain of uncertainty, you can look back at tell yourself, "Yea...I did it!!"

(Now of course, I couldn't have had the inner strength without support! First and foremost, all thanks and Glory has to go to my Heavenly Father who continued to watch over me, protect me and strengthened me throughout the fight. Next, my loving wife and daughter who were constantly by my side. My mom, my three sisters and my brother and their families were also there for me, in addition to all my other family members.  The countless prayers and support from both dear friends and even strangers also helped me fight! Without this constant support team, I could not have had the inner strength to endure.)

We Are the Dreamers of the Dream...

I think we've all heard those immortal words of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.,

 "I have a dream..."

Dr. King had a dream of equality for people of all races. The dream he had was a dream, that in his time, seemed impossible...especially considering that the civil rights of many African Americans were being violated. I'm sure Dr. King knew that before his dream would become a reality, it would take sacrifice, hard work, determination and hours upon hours of dedication to the cause. I'm sure that it didn't matter to Dr. King how long it took to achieve the dream...as long as the dream became a reality.

 If you really think about it, the overall attitude of Dr. King should inspire us to realize our dreams and goals... it doesn't matter what goals or dreams you may have. Maybe you want lose 30 pounds...or start your own business. Maybe you want to build a better relationship with your family and friends. Whatever your dream or goal is,the same traits that Dr. King possessed are necessary to obtain your goals.

1. Sacrifice- All goals and dreams require a sacrifice of some sort. If you want to improve your health, that might mean giving up certain foods and replacing them with healthier choice. If you want to start your own business, that might mean that you have to stop spending on non-essentials in order to save up starting capital. The sacrifices you make today will put you one step closer to your goal.
2. Hard Work- Nothing EVER comes easy when it comes to achieving your goals and dreams. There's no getting around it...you must work hard to get that goal you're chasing. Everything from fitness to relationships REQUIRE that the work be put in order to get results. DO THE WORK!!!
3. Determination- If you want to succeed at anything, you have to have an attitude of being determined. You can't allow the everyday challenges in life to get you down. In order to progress, you have to rise above those challenges.
4. Hours upon hours of dedication and committment- What are you willing to do to achieve your goal? In order to reach your dreams, time MUST be spent in order for your dream to become a reality. The more time you spend in working on your dreams and goals, the more you stand a chance of succeeding

Having a dream or goal is the easy part. Working towards and achieving that goal is a different story altogether. No matter what your dream is, no matter how big it is, no matter what it takes, each and every one of us has the potential to reach deep inside ourselves and achieve greatness!!! So what are you waiting for? Like the picture says, time will pass anyway...might as well chase that dream and make it a reality!!!

What is YOUR dream??? 
 

A Different Kind of Birthday...

 (When I first got out of the hospital in Albuquerque, this song came on the radio and I honestly felt that this was God's way of telling me that everything was going to be ok. We had some pretty big giants to face, but His voice of truth was right...we would be ok!)

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."- Jeremiah 29:11

(This particular scripture also helped us get through our journey. I offer it as a prayer for anyone who is currently struggling with their own adversities...may you be encouraged and lifted up like we were by this verse!)

I remember it like it was yesterday (even though it's already been a year ago).

 The conversation went a little like this:
  
DOCTOR: "Mr. Mecale...we got the results back from pathology and the biopsy shows that you have esophageal cancer." 

ME: "But what about the other biopsy that was done at the hospital in Gallup?"

DOCTOR: "We haven't got the results from that test, but chances are it's going to show the same thing...I'm sorry"

From that point on, the whole conversation was kind of a blur. I remember the doctor saying something about the various doctors that would come to talk to me about what would happen next as far as my treatment for the cancer.

After he left, while sitting with my wife, we both were reeling from the news that we just received. It was shocking, scary, but most of mind numbing. I mean honestly, who expects to go into the hospital one day to learn that they have a sickness that could potentially kill them? It was quite a shock. As a matter of fact, it was so shocking to both of us that I remember that we didn't even cry when we first found out. (Although the tears would come later.)

We sat in that hospital room and pondered what would happen next. We knew that we would have to discuss treatments and all that other medical stuff that comes from a diagnosis of having cancer. We also had to discuss what we would have to do as far as personal matters. How would we handle the doctor's visits? How about the time away from work that would be missed because of this? How are we going to provide for Kateri during this time? How do we explain to Kateri that daddy is very sick and that he is going to be going through treatments that are going to make daddy feel even more sick? How am I going to provide for my wife while I am sick? So while all these thoughts raced through my frenzied mind, there was also a moment of calmness and peacefulness that I felt within me. On one hand I was scared out of my mind, but on the other, I was ok with what I had been told. (Even though my wife was terrified beyond belief!) With all the questions that we were facing, my answer for all those questions were answered with, "We'll cross that bridge when we get there," or "We'll worry about that when we have to...there is no sense in getting worried about things before they occur."

So here we are, it is August 1, 2012, exactly one year from the day we received the news that I had cancer. It's hard to believe that it's already been a year. In retrospect, there were things that I learned while going through cancer. The kind of things that are life changing! I learned that the things that I used to think were important, no longer were that important. And the things that I took for granted, I no longer wanted to take for granted. It's like I had been given a new outlook on life. People say that going through something like cancer makes one a different person. Well that definitely holds true for me, It forced me to slow down and really take a look at my life. It forced me to take a look at the life I was leading and it made me realize that I had to make some changes. In order for me to live life to the fullest, I had to realize that I needed to be fit and healthy. No. I HAD to be fit and healthy! I faced something that could have taken my life. Only by the grace of God am I able to still be here! No more taking life for granted! I want to live each day to the fullest! I am grateful and thankful for my "new life" that I have been given. I have a loving wife and daughter who need me now more than ever. I have my health back (thanks be to God) and I have been blessed with my family and my friends who supported me (and still support me) to this day...and also by the kindness of many people who we didn't even know. I thank everyone who has been there for us!!

Now that I have looked back on this past year and I've had time to reflect on the things that happened in the past year, I am grateful that I am alive! I have my wife and daughter by my side. I have my health. I have faced the beast that is cancer and I came out clean on the other side. So in some ways, it's like I got a new life because of what we have gone through. Some might ask, "If you had to it to do all over again...would you go through it again?"  If this was a part of my journey, and it took this battle with cancer to get me to the point that I'm at now in my life, then of course I would go through it again, I wouldn't have traded this experience for anything!